BLOG CHANGES

Hello everyone!

We want to inform you of some changes we are making. We are updating our blogs which will include changing title, layout, and other details. Andi's blog (http://andibrubaker.blogspot.com/) will now be primarily used to update you on our ministry here in Guatemala instead of using two separate blogs because of the way ministry and vision has changed since we started our updates. As we merge the two blogs together, you will receive emails about old posts that we are transferring from one blog to the other. These are not new posts and we apologize for the extra emails.

Building Relationships

Our neighbor kids have been so much fun to get to know! We have them over every Monday and Thursday afternoons to play games, hang out, and have a snack. There are three kids who have been consistent in coming over and others who occasionally show up. A few weeks ago, they began asking if we had puzzles, legos, or any new games to play (they seemed to be getting a little board with some of the games we had) so we began looking for more things to do with them. We borrowed some puzzles from my brothers, my sister gave us some legos sets that weren’t being used at her house, and we bought some other fun activities to do. Thank you to those who are supporting us and making it possible to get new games and toys! Our neighbor kids love it and so do we!

Here are some of the new things we have been able to buy: 

     - Chalk
     - Puzzle
     - Balls
     - Cones
     - Legos
     - Crayons
     - Small blocks
     - Educational game

 

When Andi’s parents visited back in January, they brought supplies to make Ninja Stress Balls, but the kids weren’t showing up around that time because school was just starting. We just recently remembered about it so we pulled it out one day for the kids to make and take home with them. They really enjoyed it and we made a big mess with the flour which is always fun!

We are also really excited that we have been getting to know the mom of a couple of the kids who come over. She is the first parent with whom we have had the opportunity to interact much. Just the other night, she sent her son to bring us a special treat they had made. This meant so much to us! She has shown us multiple times how much it means to her that we are investing in the lives of her son and daughter. We hope that this relationship will continue to grow!

A couple quick updates: First, our truck has been great! Thank you again to all who gave so we could purchase it! Second, an update about our house search will be coming soon so keep an eye out! :) 

Thank you for your prayers! 

Krishauna and Andi

I carry you in my heart

It has been a while since I've written. I haven't forgotten. I'm not too busy. I just couldn't write. I couldn't find the words and I didn't really want to try. But here it is…

I have been struggling.

The last few months have been hard. On February 22nd, we got great news that I was pregnant. We went into our 8-week appointment on March 18th to find out I had what is called a molar pregnancy. Having only half of the chromosomes meant that the baby couldn't form correctly, but instead, a clump of cells was growing at an accelerated rate. So, after some blood tests, a D&C was scheduled for three days later on March 21st. The operation went smoothly and the doctor was very optimistic that everything was removed, but it took a couple months and multiple blood tests every few weeks to verify that no further action would be required. Physically, I am doing great and my levels are back to normal. Praise God!

Emotionally, it has been difficult. We have lost a child and that isn't an easy thing to deal with. I have been a mess (Ask Andi… he was right by me through it all).

Now, before anyone tries to tell me that it wasn't a child, just stop. I don't need to hear that. It isn't helpful (I have multiple reasons for why I believe it was a child and I would love to share those with anyone who would like to hear them, but I won't go into that now). No matter what you believe about when a life begins and what happens in a molar pregnancy, we still lost the future of having this child in our family and it hurts.

My necklace reminder of our baby

I am slowly healing from this. God has sent many people into my life who have been such an encouragement to me. There are people who have just sat and listened to me, some have shared their experiences with me, and others have given pieces of advice and encouragement. It still hurts and I won't ever fully get over the hurt of losing this child, but God is working in me and that feels good.

I could still use prayer. Some days, the emotions hit harder and I feel depressed and angry that we are having to go through this. Other

days, I am able to give it all to God 

and trust Him and His timing for 

our lives.

Thank you for all those who have been praying for us and encouraging us through this time!

Krishauna (and Andi)

Intermissions conference and our trip to Xela

Last weekend we had the opportunity to spend a weekend with other missionaries from all around Guatemala at a conference right beside Lake Atlitlan. The conference rented out the entire hotel and we used the facility to meet for seminars, general sessions, meals, and relaxation. The event was such a great experience in making connections and meeting other missionaries, hearing sermons based on Psalm 23, seeing the beautiful views, listening to the Johnson Strings (if you want to hear a super talented family playing string instruments visit thejohnsonstrings.com or find them on youtube – it will be worth your time), and worshiping our Creator.

The theme for the conference was “He Restores.” A pastor from Texas came and spoke four sermons throughout the weekend all based in Psalm 23. It was such an encouragement and challenge to dig deeply into this one chapter. Here are a few of our notes from the sessions that hopefully have an impact on you as well.

1 The Lord is my Shepherd.
          He Provides, He protects, He Directs (to point/to show), He guides
               (to go with).
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet
     waters
          -God makes us lie down – sometimes He needs to use forcible
               action.
          -Our hearts are prone to wander – prone to leave the God I love so
               He forces us to Rest
          -We need God to make us lie down because we are exhausted –
               physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally.
          -He will set the pace – Keep in step with the Spirit – perhaps we
               need to slow down or maybe we are lagging behind His pace.
3 He Restores my soul
          God restores us from:
               -Our Guilt – it weighs us down. God doesn’t remind us of our
                    sins that is Satan. Jesus triumphed overall all sin by
                    carrying all of our guilt on Him on the cross.
               -Our sorrow- Will yourself to worship God. Focus on what is to
                    come not on what was lost. I encourage you to read 2
                    Samuel 12:18-23 about the story of David and how he
                    dealt with sorrow. It teaches us a lot about how to deal
                    with sorrow.
               -Our Bitterness – Bitterness is a root and we need God to
                    SHUB us. SHUB is the Hebrew word for restore and
                    it means to turn over or to turn around. God restores us
                    like a Shepherd toward his sheep.
4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear
     no evil for you are with me.
          -Valleys symbolize darkness, difficulty and struggle, but they are
               passable.
          -In valleys we tend to hear God the clearest and sense Him the
               closest.
          -When you are in the valley refuse to fear because God is with
               you.
          -Shadows can’t hurt you, and they aren’t possible without light,
               which shows yet again that THE LIGHT is with you.

We also were able two seminars about “Leading Change” and “Storm Season.” The leader of “Storm Season” is a certified professional counselor and talked about the biology of what happens inside your brain as you go through storms and struggles in life. He referenced Acts 27 and the struggles and storms Paul went through as a missionary and follower of Christ. You have to be able to find what your anchors are in the midst of a ‘storm’ as well as staying on the ‘ship’ of faith – “Don’t abandon ship.” The other seminar about “Leading Change” the leader talked about how to find the root of the problem to change. We need to look for measurable and specific goals. He talked about how many missionaries come to a country looking to teach the value of education when the source of the problem may be malnutrition. For example: Kids are not learning in school because they their body cannot function without nutrients and food so in response their parents pull them out of school because the kids say they didn’t learn anything. Parents decide if their kids aren’t learning anything what’s the point of sending them to school when they can work and earn money for the family. So the root of the problem is not valuing education but instead is malnutrition. So the key to leading change is finding the crucial moment and root of the problem.

The entire conference was a blessing and encouragement to both of us. We also made quite a few connections with other missionaries here in Guatemala.

You have probably heard that we are living close to Antigua for right now while Andi takes Spanish lessons, but we are planning to move to a different area of Guatemala later on. We have taken some trips with Hope for Home Ministries to see some different places and to see if and how our ministries would fit in those areas, but other places weren't standing out to us and we were both feeling drawn to the city of Quetzaltenango, also known as Xela (pronounced shayla) even though we had never visited. We contacted a missionary family who lives up in that area and asked if it would be possible for us to visit them to see their ministry (Foundations of Hope) and the area. So after the intermissions conference ended, we picked up a shuttle to Xela to stay for a few days.

Quetzaltenango means "the place of the quetzal bird" (the Guatemala national bird) and the Maya name for the city is Xela so either name is acceptable. It is the second largest city in Guatemala although it doesn't feel like a large city like you would expect to see in the United States. The city is at about 7,700 feet altitude.

The first day we were in Xela, we got to go out and explore. We walked all over the city. We saw central park, a couple different market areas, many small parks, banks, tiendas, restaurants, coffee shops, schools, and more. It was a really good way for us to get a feel of what was available and what it could be like to live there, but we forgot to take into account the elevation difference from where we live (about 2,700 feet difference) so we both got some sunburn after a few hours of walking around. In the afternoon, we went to a soccer ministry that Foundations of Hope is involved with three days a week. Andi was able to get a lot of advice about sports ministry and see how this specific soccer ministry works. At the beginning of each practice, a Bible lesson is presented along with some discussion and prayer because this is the main point of the soccer ministry. They use soccer to draw kids in which gives an opportunity to share about Jesus.

The second day, we got to join Foundations of Hope at their after school program that they do two days a week. There are 12 kids that regularly attend the program. They feed the kids lunch, give them homework help and re-teach things that the kids didn't understand in school, help them to practice reading, music time, Bible lessons and activity, English lesson, and some fun at the end doing games or soccer. It is a great opportunity to show the kids in the community that they care about them and pour into their 

lives. That evening, we drove around so we could see some communities outside the city, but close enough to still do ministry there.

At intermissions, we met another family who has a ministry in Xela so on our last day, we got to visit their ministry in the morning. Ensenanza de Agua Viva (Living Water Teaching) has a Bible university, a school for children K-12, an orphanage, a church, and a lot of space for hosting teams and other christian groups. Then, in the afternoon, we went with Foundations of Hope to the soccer program again and got to see some more communities right outside the city.

The whole trip was a great opportunity for us! While we still don't have an answer as to if we are going to move to Xela or not, it is giving us a lot to think and pray about. Please pray with us that God will show us if Xela is where He wants us to settle long-term.

Andi and Krishauna

A glimpse into my life

Checha has been doing really well with his schooling, We hit a wall a while back when it seemed that he was forgetting many of the letters he had already learned. I wondered if seizure activity was causing this so he went in for testing and they determined that he wasn't having seizures. This was great news to hear, but it made me realize that it was going to be more difficult for him to learn so I had to reevaluate the teaching strategies I had been using with him. I realized that I had to come up with a new way to help him remember his letters. Checha can communicate well through speaking, but he started learning to sign the letters as well as saying a word that starts with each letter. This helps him to make connections through multiple senses. He is seeing the letters, doing the signs with his hand, hearing the sounds each letter makes, and then saying the name of each letter. It is amazing how well he is doing with all of this! If he forgets what letter it is, he can usually come up with the sign and the word that goes with it which then helps him to remember the letter. He just finished learning the while alphabet this past week! In addition to that, he can now spell his name (Cesar) and his nickname (Checha) and he has been practicing writing his name on his own. It has been made clear that writing is extremely difficult for him because of his coordination and difficulty with fine motor skills so we are beginning typing classes. He is so excited about this! He is still working to be able to write his name, but we believe that reading and spelling can be best learned through typing for him. Please pray for Checha as he has such a desire to learn, but he gets discouraged when he can't get it right away.

My sisters, Carissa and Taryn, who have been in Uganda are here for a visit!! There were some issues with visa renewal and plane tickets so they ended up getting to come to Guatemala for a few weeks.

Also, Brittney and Joel moved to the area for a couple weeks as the due date for their son was getting close and their doctor is in Antigua. The baby decided he didn't want to wait any longer so Christopher Caleb Caal Fulp was born on Friday, Februlary 3rd (10 days early)! 

Christopher Caleb Caal Fulp

We are loving this time with our new little nephew!

We have been attending Shoreline Guatemala church in Antigua since November. The church has been such a blessing to us since moving here. It is a new, quickly growing bilingual church plant of Shoreline Dallas. The church just found a permanent place to meet so that is very exciting news. The past couple months, we had to wait for an email on Friday or Saturday telling us where and what time the church was going to meet on Sunday. That's just something to get used to living in Guatemala; being flexible and patient like this is an everyday thing here. On Sunday, we were getting our message from the Shoreline Dallas pastor. We had our regular worship time, mingle time, some announcements, and then our pastor got up to say that the message was on it's way... literally on a motorcycle on it's way to the church. Shoreline Dallas had to upload the message and then we had to download it, but internet speed slowed things down. It's funny how in this culture, nobody even cared. We just got extra time to get a drink or donut or just sit and visit with those sitting around us. 

I told Andi a couple weeks ago that I know there are things I can be doing to get ready for future special education ministry, but I lack the motivation right now to get those things done. Earlier this week, my dad contacted me with an opportunity to do exactly what God has called me to do. There is a family here who has a daughter with Down syndrome. She attends a school, but her teacher doesn't know how to help her learn. They asked me if I would go to meet and evaluate her to then come up with an educational plan. I met her yesterday and she is such a joy to be around! There is a special place in my heart for those with Down syndrome and I am excited about the chance to work with her more!! The goal is for me to work to train her teacher and possibly an aide so they know how to best help this little girl. God knows that I often need a push to make me start into something new. My fears keep me from moving forward. This opportunity is exactly what I need. I am excited to see how this will build my confidence and push me forward!

Thank you for your prayers!

Krishauna and Andi 

Focus

Most of us have goals in life. We have ideas of where we want to be a few months or years from now or what changes we want to make in our lives. Some goals we make are short term and some are long term. Goals are great to make. They make us look at our lives and really think about what we are doing and what we should be doing. But sometimes when we get so focused on our long term goals, we can miss what God wants to do in us and through us right now.

I have spent much of my life in this state. Almost every long term goal I make is about trying to get to the next step in life. My goals aren’t always bad ones, but I can be too focused on where I want to be that I am not paying attention to where I am. This leads to a lot of waiting around. I had a goal of trying to “get through” school so I could move onto what I really wanted to be doing. Waiting. After school, my goal was to “get through” the time leading up to being married. More waiting. After that, we were living in the U.S. and my new goal was to “get through” that temporary job and living situation so I could finally be in Guatemala. Even more waiting. Since we have been here in Guatemala, my goal was to (again) “get through” another temporary living situation so things can be permanent, I can finally be where God wants me to be, and I can start what He has called me to do here. Still waiting. I haven’t done much with these times of waiting. They were just spent trying not to go crazy while waiting. But I have learned that...

This waiting time isn’t meant to be wasted time

Waiting is difficult. I have my own goals and plans and waiting is not part of them. It is often so difficult because that isn’t where my heart is, but that doesn’t mean I am not supposed to be there. God has different plans than I do and waiting can be part of His plan to do great things in and through me. When I focus on where I want to be instead of looking at where I am, I waste much of this time of waiting; time where God wants to work in me, but I am not paying attention.

How many times have I missed opportunities that are right in front of me because I am focussed on my goals and where I wish I could be right now?

Am I missing what God has for me right now? God has placed me here. It isn’t a surprise to Him that I am living in this house in Guatemala. I know I am where God wants me so I should be anxious to see how He wants to use me each and every day and what He is trying to teach me while I am here instead of only looking forward to what is coming next. I should be living in each moment asking God what He wants me to do RIGHT NOW.

The focus is not where I want to be or who I want to be. I need to just focus on God and he will lead me to where he wants me to be as the person he wants me to be in his timing.

Here are some questions I am trying to ask myself as I make large goals:

• Is God my focus in these goals? 
• Is God leading me to make these goals? 
• Am I dreaming big? Am I setting God-sized goals that I can’t possibly accomplish on my own apart from God? 
• Am I taking these goals seriously while also being flexible for God to change them as he sees fit? 
• Are my short term goals leading me toward my long term goals or away from them? 
• Am I still living right now? Just because I have long term goals doesn’t mean I should only focus on those.  
• Who can help to hold me accountable to follow through with the goals I have set?

                                                           ~Krishauna

Christmas, Spanish, Residency, and Tea Parties

We have Christmas decorations up!! This is my absolute favorite time of the year! I love the decorations, lights, music, and almost everything else about it (I just really miss having snow)! Andi survived back to back Christmas Tree days with me. The day after Thanksgiving was Brubaker Christmas Tree Day and then we joined my family for Fulp Christmas Tree Day! It was so much fun... but Andi might feel differently ;) 

I have been working on my Spanish on my own just through talking to friends, books, and online resources. I am feeling pretty good about how I am doing, but I still make plenty of mistakes. I didn't want to pay for more Spanish classes (I took classes after my family moved here in 2011) because I felt that more grammar work wasn't what I needed. I talked to a friend and we are getting together once a week for a language exchange. I am helping her with English and she is helping me with Spanish. We just talk with each other and help or correct when we say things incorrectly. It is a really neat opportunity for me and I am really excited about it! Hopefully this will help me become more comfortable speaking Spanish.

Last month, we began working on residency stuff for Andi and began the work for my name change (I am already a resident). This past Thursday, we went into the city for another appointment with our lawyer. After signing some papers, standing in lines, paying a fine, getting pictures taken, and lots of confusion (Andi and I were confused... not our lawyer), Andi is officially "in process" now and my new passport is off getting the residency stamp! The appointment only took about 1 hour and 45 minutes! This is amazing for the immigration office in Guatemala and for everything we had to get done! YAY! Pray that the rest of the process goes smoothly.

Andi and I have been having different members of my family over to our house a few at a time to hang out and play games. Last week, it was Kimmie's turn. She came over and we had a tea party (well, it ended up being a coffee party) and played some games, but we didn't let Andi join because it was a girly party. It is so much fun being able to spend time with family like this!

We are starting to look for a vehicle now. Because of road conditions all over Guatemala, there are certain things we are looking for in a vehicle. This means we can't just go with a cheap little car. We already have some money put aside for a vehicle, but we will need more than we have at this point. Please be praying with us as we look for the right vehicle for us and pray that God will provide the money. If you would like to help us out, you can give to Hope for Home and designate it to "Brubaker vehicle". Thank you!

Krishauna and Andi